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It, it takes emotional intelligence
and, um, if you do not do your

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healing work, you don’t have it.

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I raised my three children with the
emotional intelligence of a fifteen- year-

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old, because that’s where it stopped.

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That was my biggest trauma,

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and that’s where it stops.

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Today, we’re speaking with Tywanah Evette.

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She is a spiritual strategist,
a trauma recovery facilitator,

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a woman’s advocate, bestselling
author, and an inspirational speaker.

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Tywanah, could you please
introduce yourself?

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Let people know just a little
more about you, please.

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Thank you so much, and thank
you for having me here today.

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I’m really excited about this.

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Um, so I, I am actually a
fourth generation, um, intuitive

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healer and psychic medium.

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Um, I help women to heal their trauma,
you know, from any abuse, neglect,

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um, or even just the kids going off
to college and not having an identity.

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Um, and find their purpose
and step into their power.

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Um, I am also the creator of the
Heal Her Summit coming up next week.

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And the, uh, book that, um, I am
creating, another one, it’s called Why.

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Which is a book of women’s,
why they didn’t report abuse.

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That’s awesome.

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I, I really like what you’re doing,
it’s awesome that you’re helping

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women that struggle with these things.

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Uh, many women are struggling out there.

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Our society is just really negative
anymore and I, I think we need to pull

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together and come together as a nation,
as people, and put an end to this abuse.

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So you’ve got a very interesting
story and it’s heart, it’s heart

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wrenching, you know, so could you
please just tell people your story?

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I’m just gonna shut up and let you go.

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Absolutely, it’s my pleasure.

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Um, it, it is a sad story, but
healing from it is amazing.

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And helping other women is just beautiful.

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But I, my father, um, when I
was nine years old, my natural

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father came looking for me.

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I never knew that the father my mom
had remarried wasn’t my father, because

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daddy always made me feel like I was his.

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And he always made me feel
like I could do anything.

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And when daddy was in my
life, I remember being happy.

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But one day this man shows up at
my grandmother’s house and, um,

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my grandmother calls my mother
and lets her know that my natural

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father came looking for me.

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So I met him a week
later and his girlfriend.

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And when his girlfriend walked
in my nana’s house, you know,

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I greeted her with a hug.

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She was warm and beautiful.

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And when I saw him, I hid
behind my grandmother.

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Um, I knew then something was off.

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And he had bought me a bunch of
pretty dresses and things like that.

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I never wanted to wear them, I felt icky.

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Mom had a nervous breakdown
shortly after that and lost her

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job ’cause her and daddy split up.

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And we moved to Seattle for a
little while and I was really happy

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there with my aunt and my uncle.

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And she decided to go to nursing school
and so she sent me to live with my father.

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The night that I arrived,
I was sitting on the bed,

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I was ten years old, I, I
remember I had a white dress on.

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And, um, his girlfriend, she walks
past the bedroom to the door and

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she’s got like baskets and trash bags.

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They were arguing and
she goes, Baby, I tried.

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I’ll be back every week to do your hair.

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So that night I cry myself to sleep
because I miss my mother, I’m in this

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house with this strange man, I don’t like
his energy, and, um, miss Jean is gone.

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And, um, my father came in that room
that night and took my virginity,

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that went on for five years.

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He threatened and bullied my mother
into remarrying him by using his

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status in the church and his status
with the Department of Immigration

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to say he would take me permanently.

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She’d never seen me again.

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So she remarried him
under those circumstances.

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But she was a nurse, so she worked nights.

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And, um, the abuse went on for five years
until I had a positive pregnancy test.

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Um,

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I did not tell my mother.

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I shared with my best friend in
high school that I was pregnant,

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she assumed it was my boyfriend’s
who had never touched me.

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And she went with me
to release that child.

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Um, I held that secret thirty-two years.

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I was, uh, mom had a terminal diagnosis
shortly after, and when I shared with

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her the abuse, not the pregnancy, I
just said he was being inappropriate.

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She didn’t know what to
do, she was dying, um,

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she couldn’t, she had no job, she
had nothing, she couldn’t support me.

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So I went and lived in the New
York City group home system.

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I found comfort in becoming a
mother at eighteen, um, by choice.

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And, um,

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shortly after that, when I was twenty-one,
I married, of course, an abusive man.

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Because what do I know about,
you know, normal good people.

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You know, I’m, I’m too traumatized
to understand good people

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anymore ’cause daddy was gone.

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And, um, he was very abusive,
I had two children by him.

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That ended in divorce because I was held
at gunpoint while he described how he

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was gonna take the children’s life and
his own and leave me with that memory.

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I got away, the kids and I got away.

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And, um, I married another man
who was verbally abusive and threw

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me and my kids on the street.

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So I took a break.

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I’m like, Okay, there’s a pattern here.

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And I took a four year break, and I invest
in myself, and I’m doing Pilates, and I’m,

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I’m, I’m feeling good and I’m doing well.

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I had gone to therapy, you know,
I really felt good about myself.

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So I took a chance on dating
again, and I meet this

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charismatic fourth grade teacher.

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And I’m like, Yes, I finally healed.

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How can I get much better
than a fourth grade teacher?

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That man stole my soul.

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He would belittle and berate me
for three days at a time, taking

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me to the point of a seizure and
then saying, Go take your medicine.

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Because I have epilepsy.

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I was never good enough, I was never
pretty enough, I was never this

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enough, I never did that enough.

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He was the first person

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when I met him that I realized I had
never loved anyone, no man, except him.

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I loved his son, who is one
of the biggest, brightest bits

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of sunshine in this world.

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He and I were very, very close.

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And

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I shared with him what happened, he
was the first person I opened up to.

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He took that story to school and
him and the teachers had a good

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laugh about it, even though they’re
mandated to report things like that.

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And he took it to his family and
him and his family had a good laugh

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about it, even though his sister is a
domestic violence advocate here in DC.

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I had to come to DC, my sister
lost her husband suddenly.

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And when I got back

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the next day, I took an entire
bottle of pills with hot coffee.

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Drank vinegar to make them melt
and went and laid in the woods.

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I was tired, I was tired.

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But if anybody here believes in the
ancestral plane, that’s where I was taken.

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Where I saw daddy and mom.

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And mom told me I had to
come back, I had a purpose.

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She told me women were waiting for me.

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I didn’t understand it, and then
she pushed me back in my body.

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I went on a very long healing journey.

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I moved up to DC to help my sister,
they had a six month old cane corso.

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She had no idea what to do with him.

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And, um, she was devastated.

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I had never seen my sister jello, she
was jello when she lost her soulmate.

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Um, my sister’s this type A, you
know, kind of congresswoman type.

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And to see her on the edge of the
bed where she didn’t even know

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how to put her stockings on, I
didn’t know how to process that.

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I stayed with my sister for
eight months until she healed.

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But while I lived with her,
that’s when I knew I was a healer.

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Because while I was losing everything
and everyone around me, she was healing.

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I was filtering her emotions, and even
the dog’s sometimes, his emotions.

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I helped him heal as well.

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I moved into my apartment, my
mother’s voice got undeniably loud.

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And last February she said,
It is time to use your voice.

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And I’m like, To do what?

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And I look on Facebook and there’s
a call for podcasts, and I’m not

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even in any of the groups yet.

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You know, I, I just happened
to open it and here it is.

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And I’m like, Okay, you’re funny lady.

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And um, it was the first time, it
was the first time that I announced

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to the world that I’m a healer,

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I’m a medium.

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And I spoke my truth and it felt good.

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And every time after that I got stronger
and stronger and stronger and less

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and less afraid to speak my truth.

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Even though my children didn’t
wanna be a part of my lives

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understandably at the time.

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I, I understood their
decision, I respected it.

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I just, you know, I would send
Happy Birthday, I would send money,

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you know, cards, things like that,
and let them have their space.

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They were all adults when this happened.

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And, um, I haven’t shut up
since, and I won’t, I won’t.

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Hey, that, that’s awesome.

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You know, Tywanah, a lot of people
need to find that passion to

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share and that guidance to give.

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Because there’s so many people out
there taking and they take and they

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take, but nobody wants to give.

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And that’s what our world needs so
much right now, is people to give back.

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And that’s what we’re doing here
at the Dead America Podcast, we,

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we believe in stories and the,
the enlightenment that people can

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get out of stories and experience.

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Every one of us has that experience
and it is so important to share,

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that relieves us emotionally.

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And it, it allows us to love
again, it, it really helps.

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So there’s a lot of women out there
that need to discover how to come to

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the forward position of life and share
what’s going on, my wife included.

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She went through similar things
in her childhood, and it’s taken

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fifty-five, fifty-six years to
really start getting a, or a grasp

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on what is happening in her life.

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So how do women get out of the emotional
state and into that advocate state where

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they can start sharing their story?

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First of all, you, you need help.

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Um, I had no support system, but my
healing journey was designed that way

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so that I could teach how to heal.

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Um, you first have to acknowledge
it within yourself because I walked

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around with a smile for all of this
time while I was screaming inside.

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I had to sit and acknowledge
that this actually happened,

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with me, first.

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Before you begin sharing with the
world, you have to process it yourself.

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Um,

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seek help, seek guidance, um, be it a
coach, therapist, you know, if, if you

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have a strong support system, great.

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Um, but I had no support system,
um, other than my ancestors.

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I will never discredit them.

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Yeah, for that time.

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But, um, you gotta be honest and you
have to seek the guidance and then

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you have to start taking baby steps.

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You, you may not be able to
tell the big tragedy, right?

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You may not be able to, I,
like, I couldn’t tell my

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family until the end of 2023.

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My family didn’t know.

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I told my best friend and she lost
the feeling in her knees and fell

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because she was like, I can’t believe
you didn’t tell me, I was with you.

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Um, but you have to begin
sharing in little bits.

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So even if I didn’t tell the big story,
I started sharing tiny bits of myself.

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Um, I did have kind of a part-time
coach, um, and she would advise me

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as best as she could, but my journey
was designed for me to be alone.

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Um, but the, the, the first step,
the first step is acknowledgement.

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You have to acknowledge that hurt.

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The second step is, we all have an
inner child and that inner child is

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the one who took over when trauma was
too much for the 3D body to handle.

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She’s the one, or he’s the one
that stepped forward and took that.

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Even though you may have the memory
and the physical functions of it,

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it is because of that inner child.

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Um, journaling, essential.

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It’s essential to get it down on paper
because when you reread that, that’s

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00:17:49,240 –> 00:17:50,960
when you realize this is your truth.

220
00:17:52,745 –> 00:17:56,685
That’s when you realize, I,
I, I did go through that.

221
00:17:57,865 –> 00:18:03,805
But in that journaling and in that
acknowledgement comes strength because

222
00:18:03,905 –> 00:18:07,525
that’s when you realize I survived that.

223
00:18:09,635 –> 00:18:11,765
Then you have to release
the victim mindset,

224
00:18:14,115 –> 00:18:15,255
the woe is me.

225
00:18:16,855 –> 00:18:22,175
I behave this way, the excuses, I behave
this way because this happened to me.

226
00:18:23,675 –> 00:18:24,815
You have to release that.

227
00:18:26,455 –> 00:18:26,675
Yes.

228
00:18:28,375 –> 00:18:35,355
Um, and once you release that you can
stand tall and brave and begin to share,

229
00:18:35,625 –> 00:18:37,715
even if it’s not worldwide like I’m doing.

230
00:18:39,145 –> 00:18:43,035
Even if it’s with your family and
your friends and your support system.

231
00:18:44,395 –> 00:18:49,845
Um, but those are the first three
steps and they are essential.

232
00:18:52,905 –> 00:18:53,195
Yeah.

233
00:18:53,625 –> 00:18:53,915
Yeah.

234
00:18:54,375 –> 00:18:55,955
Really, that’s good advice.

235
00:18:58,035 –> 00:19:01,275
Tackling it, it, you need to find support.

236
00:19:02,375 –> 00:19:11,120
And a lot of people, they, they are
afraid to ask for help when that is

237
00:19:11,260 –> 00:19:17,919
one of the most critical steps of
recovery is when you need help, you

238
00:19:17,919 –> 00:19:19,760
need to acknowledge you need help.

239
00:19:20,540 –> 00:19:30,220
So I found podcasting and podcasting
gave me the ability to find out who I

240
00:19:30,520 –> 00:19:41,300
was and it’s given me the ability to
step forward with a voice and learn, by

241
00:19:41,410 –> 00:19:45,020
baby steps, how to advocate for others.

242
00:19:46,250 –> 00:19:55,709
And once I started doing that, it really
made me feel like I was worth, myself,

243
00:19:56,250 –> 00:20:03,070
you know, I had a worth of value where
I did not understand my value before.

244
00:20:03,810 –> 00:20:12,399
So understanding you do have a gift and
a, a purpose, and finding it is important.

245
00:20:14,620 –> 00:20:20,350
What’s guidance to try to find
that purpose in your life?

246
00:20:20,700 –> 00:20:28,430
What are those underlying, you
know, steps that we have to

247
00:20:28,430 –> 00:20:31,070
take to step into that purpose?

248
00:20:33,600 –> 00:20:34,730
Your pain is your purpose.

249
00:20:37,290 –> 00:20:38,340
It’s that simple.

250
00:20:39,330 –> 00:20:40,980
Your pain is your purpose.

251
00:20:41,920 –> 00:20:46,020
We, we, we don’t go through
these things for nothing.

252
00:20:47,845 –> 00:20:49,655
Your pain is your purpose.

253
00:20:49,915 –> 00:20:57,455
The very thing that I carried shame
for my entire life is the very

254
00:20:57,465 –> 00:20:59,335
thing that makes me beautiful.

255
00:21:00,405 –> 00:21:03,935
It’s the very thing that heals women.

256
00:21:06,405 –> 00:21:07,465
It was my pain.

257
00:21:08,685 –> 00:21:11,504
It was the agony, my trauma.

258
00:21:13,650 –> 00:21:15,790
You turn that into your purpose.

259
00:21:16,140 –> 00:21:19,310
Your purpose is not to be a
graphic designer for Google.

260
00:21:20,370 –> 00:21:23,190
That’s no one’s purpose,
that’s someone else’s vision.

261
00:21:25,340 –> 00:21:27,750
Your purpose is yours alone.

262
00:21:28,930 –> 00:21:31,550
We were born with it,
we will leave with it.

263
00:21:33,410 –> 00:21:35,710
But it’s your pain.

264
00:21:37,140 –> 00:21:37,910
It’s that simple.

265
00:21:40,410 –> 00:21:41,510
But we overcomplicate it.

266
00:21:45,060 –> 00:21:45,940
I like that a lot.

267
00:21:48,130 –> 00:21:48,420
Yeah.

268
00:21:48,970 –> 00:21:49,260
Yeah.

269
00:21:49,530 –> 00:21:56,980
There’s a lot of complications in life
and understanding that you control these

270
00:21:57,120 –> 00:22:03,660
by putting boundaries on your life, the
people, the places, the things, you know?

271
00:22:03,690 –> 00:22:08,665
Because those three things, people,
places, and things, they control you.

272
00:22:09,045 –> 00:22:18,635
And if you learn to control that,
that is when you find golden, you

273
00:22:18,635 –> 00:22:20,155
know, everything becomes clear.

274
00:22:22,295 –> 00:22:23,435
So, so,

275
00:22:24,795 –> 00:22:28,715
I, it’s so funny you said people,
places, and things, because

276
00:22:28,815 –> 00:22:30,995
that’s what I teach on my TikToks.

277
00:22:32,295 –> 00:22:36,015
I always tell them your boundaries need
to be with people, places, and things.

278
00:22:39,345 –> 00:22:39,635
Amen.

279
00:22:39,975 –> 00:22:40,645
Uh, okay.

280
00:22:40,645 –> 00:22:44,915
So let me share with you
my muddy shoe theory.

281
00:22:45,655 –> 00:22:56,035
It, it’s, life is like, you’re a muddy
shoe, and life is a muddy path, and

282
00:22:56,985 –> 00:23:01,555
life is, people, places, and things,
that’s the mud that collects on you.

283
00:23:02,335 –> 00:23:08,555
And if you’ve ever walked down a muddy
trail, you know how heavy it gets.

284
00:23:08,735 –> 00:23:10,955
It gets thick and it can build up.

285
00:23:12,375 –> 00:23:16,835
You learn quickly to wipe that
mud off and scrape it away.

286
00:23:17,990 –> 00:23:22,129
The good mud, the good people,
places and things, they’re gonna

287
00:23:22,199 –> 00:23:24,129
stay up in the tread of your shoe.

288
00:23:24,189 –> 00:23:28,370
And you can’t get rid of that
unless you hose it out and really

289
00:23:28,870 –> 00:23:30,689
get aggressive to get rid of that.

290
00:23:31,389 –> 00:23:39,680
So life is like a muddy shoe walking
down a trail, you need to find a rock,

291
00:23:40,080 –> 00:23:47,320
a stick, uh, whatever, and get rid of
that mud because that will allow you

292
00:23:47,420 –> 00:23:55,060
to be lighter, cleaner, and it, it will
allow you to finish without being tired.

293
00:23:57,200 –> 00:23:59,300
So I like to share that with people.

294
00:24:01,620 –> 00:24:08,399
So Tywanah, could you tell us about the
Heal Her Summit and the Why Movement?

295
00:24:10,395 –> 00:24:16,335
Yes, the Heal Her Summit of Global
Movement for Survivors of Abuse is

296
00:24:16,455 –> 00:24:18,895
a summit that starts next Friday.

297
00:24:19,995 –> 00:24:25,695
Um, I’ve been working, I can’t even
tell you how hard to put this together,

298
00:24:26,595 –> 00:24:30,054
but this came straight from the divine.

299
00:24:30,205 –> 00:24:32,534
This was not something I wanted to do.

300
00:24:33,435 –> 00:24:37,855
Um, when I heard it, my, my mother
is always on my right side, so

301
00:24:37,925 –> 00:24:43,675
when she said, Summit, I said, No
thanks, and continued on my day.

302
00:24:44,055 –> 00:24:46,595
And the next day she goes, Summit.

303
00:24:46,735 –> 00:24:48,875
And I said, See, I’m
talking at three next week.

304
00:24:49,024 –> 00:24:49,955
It’s on my calendar.

305
00:24:50,735 –> 00:24:52,635
And I continued on with my day.

306
00:24:53,095 –> 00:24:56,795
And you remember parents back
in the day when we didn’t do our

307
00:24:56,795 –> 00:24:59,355
chores, how they would wake us
up in the middle of the night?

308
00:25:01,445 –> 00:25:08,270
1:31 AM, it feels like something’s
brushing, you know, like this close

309
00:25:08,270 –> 00:25:15,910
to me and I hear Summit and I’m
like, Oh God, are you kidding me?

310
00:25:15,910 –> 00:25:18,110
Like, this happens in the afterlife too?

311
00:25:18,190 –> 00:25:19,230
I thought this was over.

312
00:25:19,690 –> 00:25:24,770
And I got up and it literally
just flowed through me.

313
00:25:24,930 –> 00:25:28,290
I had no name, no title, no
what, what is it supposed to be?

314
00:25:28,629 –> 00:25:32,210
And it all just came to me and by the
next morning, the website was done.

315
00:25:33,590 –> 00:25:36,030
I called my bestie and she’s
like, What are we doing?

316
00:25:37,190 –> 00:25:45,790
And so it is free, we’ve got
speakers from all over the world.

317
00:25:47,380 –> 00:25:50,840
It is going to be powerful and impactful.

318
00:25:51,700 –> 00:25:58,900
We have dropped the ugly divide
between religion and spirituality,

319
00:25:59,080 –> 00:26:01,020
and we are coming together.

320
00:26:02,979 –> 00:26:10,639
For the purpose of giving women options
and showing them that they can heal.

321
00:26:10,820 –> 00:26:16,899
But the most interesting thing
about it is all of us were abused

322
00:26:19,939 –> 00:26:24,360
and so, or have suffered
great, great traumas.

323
00:26:25,740 –> 00:26:31,105
And we all have different specialties
and modalities, we’ve got, you know,

324
00:26:31,764 –> 00:26:35,425
uh, people who are in church, we’ve
got people who are Buddhist, we’ve got

325
00:26:35,425 –> 00:26:40,625
people who are spiritual, and we are just
all coming together to love on women.

326
00:26:40,965 –> 00:26:45,175
And there are going to be, I can’t
even tell you how many freebies,

327
00:26:45,415 –> 00:26:46,815
downloads, free consultations,

328
00:26:47,195 –> 00:26:49,055
um, free classes, free courses.

329
00:26:49,995 –> 00:26:55,215
Um, I’ve got mental health specialists
that, that are providing all these

330
00:26:55,615 –> 00:26:57,535
resources that, that are unknown.

331
00:26:57,535 –> 00:27:02,335
They’re not like on the national
registry for, for women to heal, um,

332
00:27:02,395 –> 00:27:06,335
to find, you know, shelter if they
need it and, and things like that.

333
00:27:06,515 –> 00:27:12,815
So we, there are a lot of us coming
together for this and, um, we’ve

334
00:27:12,815 –> 00:27:14,495
had our bumps in the road, but

335
00:27:16,665 –> 00:27:17,565
the right people

336
00:27:19,680 –> 00:27:25,830
are coming together with the right
energy to just love on whoever’s there,

337
00:27:26,020 –> 00:27:32,230
whoever’s watching, and let them know that
we are all out here fighting for them.

338
00:27:33,810 –> 00:27:41,430
Um, through the summit, I’m working on
the summit again, and my mother goes, Why?

339
00:27:41,430 –> 00:27:42,430
And I said, I don’t know why.

340
00:27:43,470 –> 00:27:45,930
We have that kind of relationship and

341
00:27:48,230 –> 00:27:48,850
it hit me.

342
00:27:50,420 –> 00:27:51,120
It hit me.

343
00:27:53,280 –> 00:27:55,780
And so I added it to the summit page.

344
00:27:56,200 –> 00:28:06,150
And it is, I am collecting 500
women’s whys to place in an anthology.

345
00:28:07,710 –> 00:28:09,230
I just want one sentence.

346
00:28:11,260 –> 00:28:12,879
Why didn’t you report it?

347
00:28:13,070 –> 00:28:14,600
Everybody asks us that.

348
00:28:14,660 –> 00:28:20,200
Nobody asks the offender any
questions, they get away with whatever.

349
00:28:21,650 –> 00:28:26,750
But the people who are traumatized, the
survivors, ’cause we’re not victims,

350
00:28:28,920 –> 00:28:30,420
are the ones who are asked why.

351
00:28:31,450 –> 00:28:32,470
Why this, why that?

352
00:28:33,440 –> 00:28:42,020
And so I am collecting 500 women’s whys,
I am meeting with publishers, but I also

353
00:28:42,020 –> 00:28:43,820
know how to self-publish if we need to.

354
00:28:45,210 –> 00:28:48,230
And the proceeds from the book
are going back to the survivors.

355
00:28:48,230 –> 00:28:50,550
That is not my money, it is not my trauma.

356
00:28:52,240 –> 00:29:00,070
Um, each page will have one woman’s
Why, because I’m giving her that voice.

357
00:29:00,189 –> 00:29:02,189
I don’t want her mixed up in between.

358
00:29:04,449 –> 00:29:08,250
I want the impact to be that great.

359
00:29:09,705 –> 00:29:13,445
You’re taking up the page, you’re
taking up space, and this is

360
00:29:13,445 –> 00:29:14,845
your chance to use your voice.

361
00:29:15,225 –> 00:29:20,885
And they can use pen names, I
don’t care if they use SpongeBob

362
00:29:20,885 –> 00:29:23,555
Squarepants as their pen name.

363
00:29:25,735 –> 00:29:31,275
I’m the only one, my, my, my three
colleagues and I, um, the, the, the three

364
00:29:31,275 –> 00:29:38,285
women who are on my team voluntarily, who
donate their time, their money, and their

365
00:29:38,345 –> 00:29:45,475
energy to the causes because they believe
in my purpose, we are the only ones who

366
00:29:45,475 –> 00:29:50,945
will know who that woman actually is and
only so that she can receive her check.

367
00:29:54,295 –> 00:29:55,545
I like that a lot.

368
00:29:55,865 –> 00:30:02,015
You know, just that
simplicity of your why.

369
00:30:02,715 –> 00:30:07,120
You know, if you can figure that one
statement out, you can move mountains.

370
00:30:07,620 –> 00:30:10,680
And that’s what you’re doing
with this movement here.

371
00:30:11,060 –> 00:30:16,480
So I congratulate you and I applaud you,
and I encourage you to keep doing it.

372
00:30:16,870 –> 00:30:19,160
This is only the start is this not?

373
00:30:21,860 –> 00:30:26,640
So you, you intend more to
come, of these summits then?

374
00:30:28,260 –> 00:30:29,320
The summits, yes.

375
00:30:29,500 –> 00:30:31,320
And the Why Movement, yes.

376
00:30:31,659 –> 00:30:39,080
Um, I am right now doing my studies to,
um, find out the proper way to begin a

377
00:30:39,080 –> 00:30:45,879
nonprofit to help women who have been
abused have the resources to heal.

378
00:30:46,580 –> 00:30:51,870
Because the first thing that
offenders do is affect the finances.

379
00:30:53,760 –> 00:30:54,050
Yeah.

380
00:30:54,890 –> 00:30:55,180
Yeah.

381
00:30:55,530 –> 00:30:56,540
That, that’s big.

382
00:30:57,080 –> 00:30:59,580
And you know, men,

383
00:31:01,890 –> 00:31:07,080
men, they, they can be men,
let’s just leave it at that.

384
00:31:07,380 –> 00:31:15,390
And, you know, so the, the point
behind that is, women, you are people.

385
00:31:16,170 –> 00:31:19,950
You have a purpose and it’s
a very powerful purpose.

386
00:31:21,420 –> 00:31:28,790
Without you, there is none of us
because you are the womb of society.

387
00:31:29,770 –> 00:31:37,460
And men, to you, you need to understand
that and cherish these people.

388
00:31:38,399 –> 00:31:44,700
So we are different, men and
women, but we live and cohabitate

389
00:31:45,220 –> 00:31:46,820
together and we need each other.

390
00:31:47,800 –> 00:31:52,780
So the best way to understand
each other is communication.

391
00:31:54,325 –> 00:31:57,895
Stop ignoring each other and
start talking to each other.

392
00:31:58,575 –> 00:32:04,215
I find that to be one of the biggest
troubles that we have as society is

393
00:32:04,415 –> 00:32:06,215
learning to communicate with each other.

394
00:32:07,075 –> 00:32:09,615
What’s your thoughts on that, Tywanah?

395
00:32:10,285 –> 00:32:12,455
Well, it takes emotional intelligence.

396
00:32:14,105 –> 00:32:19,725
It, it takes emotional intelligence
and, um, if you do not do your

397
00:32:19,725 –> 00:32:21,445
healing work, you don’t have it.

398
00:32:21,765 –> 00:32:25,125
I raised my three children with
the emotional intelligence of

399
00:32:25,165 –> 00:32:27,325
a fifteen-year-old, because
that’s where it stopped.

400
00:32:28,155 –> 00:32:32,665
That was my biggest trauma,
and that’s where it stops.

401
00:32:33,525 –> 00:32:41,465
So we have a bunch of, you know,
traumatized gentlemen out here who, you

402
00:32:41,465 –> 00:32:47,250
know, either their mothers turn them
into narcissists or, you know, they,

403
00:32:47,250 –> 00:32:51,729
they don’t wanna deal with their trauma
and, and they act like five-year-olds.

404
00:32:53,020 –> 00:32:58,959
Um, so just as much as we need to
heal, men need people to heal them too.

405
00:32:59,100 –> 00:33:04,479
And, and, and I am very connected
to a gentleman who does heal men.

406
00:33:04,780 –> 00:33:10,560
So, you know, I, it, it’s not like I
can’t refer them to their healing as well.

407
00:33:11,450 –> 00:33:15,910
Um, but it, it, it takes
healing on both sides.

408
00:33:16,190 –> 00:33:21,190
I mean, especially, you know, when we’re
divorcing, and, and we’ve got kids from a

409
00:33:21,350 –> 00:33:26,310
previous marriage, and there’s all these
complications and things involved in life

410
00:33:26,450 –> 00:33:29,070
now that weren’t there forty years ago.

411
00:33:31,190 –> 00:33:35,770
So gentlemen are, you know,
rising up in this movement of

412
00:33:35,770 –> 00:33:37,800
they want their grandmothers back.

413
00:33:38,610 –> 00:33:43,685
And women are not saying we have a,
a problem being in that space, we’re

414
00:33:43,685 –> 00:33:47,365
just saying we want to feel safe.

415
00:33:49,274 –> 00:33:51,814
We want to feel protected.

416
00:33:54,585 –> 00:33:59,544
A lot of us went out and got jobs
and, and climbed the corporate ladder,

417
00:34:00,635 –> 00:34:06,644
not because we wanted to leave our
children with a babysitter but because

418
00:34:06,644 –> 00:34:10,605
we didn’t feel safe or protected.

419
00:34:12,844 –> 00:34:13,804
I like that a lot.

420
00:34:15,275 –> 00:34:19,614
You know, that, that truth
right there, men need to hear.

421
00:34:20,234 –> 00:34:26,955
And you know, stepping up
and being responsible, that’s

422
00:34:26,955 –> 00:34:27,995
really what it’s about.

423
00:34:28,295 –> 00:34:32,324
And that emotional intelligence is key.

424
00:34:32,945 –> 00:34:34,725
And yes, you’re so right.

425
00:34:34,725 –> 00:34:41,245
There’s so many young men, lost,
misguided, and it’s up to us as a

426
00:34:41,245 –> 00:34:43,445
society to bring that back to the center.

427
00:34:43,904 –> 00:34:51,094
And I, I really see a lot of people
taking part and helping bring that back.

428
00:34:51,614 –> 00:34:53,935
I, I really see a movement starting.

429
00:34:55,315 –> 00:34:56,255
Do you feel that?

430
00:34:57,695 –> 00:34:59,345
Yeah, I feel the inertia of it.

431
00:34:59,404 –> 00:34:59,904
Yes, I do.

432
00:35:01,865 –> 00:35:03,395
Yeah, that, that’s really good.

433
00:35:04,055 –> 00:35:08,635
So Tywanah, is there anything that
we’ve missed that you think we

434
00:35:08,635 –> 00:35:11,315
should discuss before we end this?

435
00:35:12,455 –> 00:35:12,675
No.

436
00:35:12,775 –> 00:35:16,755
We, we just have to heal our
hurts, we have to heal our hurts.

437
00:35:17,335 –> 00:35:22,875
You can’t go around, um, I use the
image of a backpack full of bricks or a,

438
00:35:23,435 –> 00:35:25,075
remember those old storage locker trunks?

439
00:35:26,900 –> 00:35:31,500
I, I always tell my clients, You’ve
got this trunk in your subconscious

440
00:35:32,400 –> 00:35:36,700
and you’ve put clothes, and cinder
blocks, and concrete, and you’re,

441
00:35:36,700 –> 00:35:38,180
and you’re trying to hide it, right?

442
00:35:38,640 –> 00:35:42,259
It will never hide, it’s always gonna come
back in some way, shape, form, or fashion.

443
00:35:43,270 –> 00:35:44,680
It’s going to show up.

444
00:35:46,150 –> 00:35:52,529
So let’s chip away at it, open
up Pandora’s box, get it out,

445
00:35:53,480 –> 00:35:57,410
clean everything out, and replace
it with goodness and self-love.

446
00:35:58,650 –> 00:36:03,319
Um, so, and I use the
chakra system to do it, so

447
00:36:05,720 –> 00:36:06,009
Yeah.

448
00:36:06,480 –> 00:36:07,009
Good, good.

449
00:36:07,509 –> 00:36:10,140
You know, it, it’s okay to be broken.

450
00:36:10,910 –> 00:36:15,170
Uh, all, all you need to do is
find the glue to put yourself back

451
00:36:15,450 –> 00:36:19,690
together, and that glue is gonna be
those people, places, and things.

452
00:36:20,440 –> 00:36:26,540
Find the right people, the right
places, and the right things to put

453
00:36:26,600 –> 00:36:32,260
in your life, and that’s glue that
will bind you in the right way.

454
00:36:32,840 –> 00:36:34,835
So I really,

455
00:36:36,865 –> 00:36:40,435
yeah, I really love
conversations like this.

456
00:36:41,885 –> 00:36:42,345
Go ahead.

457
00:36:44,325 –> 00:36:49,265
The book that I am in, um, the book
that my story is in, my story is called

458
00:36:49,625 –> 00:36:53,075
Kintsugi, um, The Making of a Goddess.

459
00:36:53,575 –> 00:36:58,475
And it’s a Japanese art where when
a ceramic bowl falls and cracks,

460
00:36:58,745 –> 00:37:00,235
they put it back together with gold.

461
00:37:01,680 –> 00:37:03,700
It becomes more valuable than it ever was.

462
00:37:05,040 –> 00:37:09,660
And so my cracks are filled with gold now.

463
00:37:10,250 –> 00:37:15,060
I’ve got the most amazing friends, don’t
have a lot of ’em because I don’t want

464
00:37:15,220 –> 00:37:22,940
’em, um, but the ones that I have, there
is nothing they wouldn’t do for me.

465
00:37:24,370 –> 00:37:28,230
Um, so I have my gold, my
cracks are full of gold.

466
00:37:30,535 –> 00:37:31,115
That’s awesome.

467
00:37:31,615 –> 00:37:36,075
You know, and, and that is a, a
treasure in your life when you

468
00:37:36,485 –> 00:37:39,155
understand that simple thing.

469
00:37:41,065 –> 00:37:42,145
Tywanah,

470
00:37:42,695 –> 00:37:43,755
And my babies are healing.

471
00:37:44,375 –> 00:37:44,595
Yes.

472
00:37:45,375 –> 00:37:51,405
How can people find you, reach out
to you, and get involved with you?

473
00:37:53,015 –> 00:37:58,685
Black butterfly goddess on every social
media platform as well as my website.

474
00:37:59,545 –> 00:38:04,485
Um, and then the summit is
heal her, all one word, .biz.

475
00:38:05,585 –> 00:38:10,715
You’re a very powerful force and
I appreciate what you’re doing.

476
00:38:10,805 –> 00:38:14,275
Thank you for sharing it here today
with us on the Dead America Podcast.

477
00:38:16,165 –> 00:38:16,675
Thank you.

478
00:38:20,485 –> 00:38:22,155
Thank you for joining us today.

479
00:38:22,855 –> 00:38:28,970
If you found this podcast enlightening,
entertaining, educational in any way,

480
00:38:29,870 –> 00:38:36,210
please share, like, subscribe, and join
us right back here next week for another

481
00:38:36,339 –> 00:38:39,290
great episode of the Dead America Podcast.

482
00:38:40,029 –> 00:38:45,609
I’m Ed Watters, your host, enjoy
your afternoon wherever you might be.